Today I am at home because I'm mentally ill, so technically I can still call it a sick day. Yeterday just got to be too much for me. Not so bad that I had to take a Xanax, but bad enough where I felt I needed to take a day to recover.
It was a deeper anxiety that what a Xanax could cure.
I get anxious when there are things out of place. While I was at work all I could think about were all the piles of laundry that were lying around the house, the dishes that needed washed, the knee deep crap in the playroom, the bills that needed to be paid, and the files that needed filed. I know everyone gets anxious about that kind of stuff, but mine was debilitating yesterday. So far I've gotten a grip on the household clutter and I feel much better, well enough to sit here and write this even though I am surrounded by piles of books and papers that I have yet to attend to.
Sometimes I need a day to wallow in my mental illness. I need to stop and refocus, and clean up both physically and mentally. Does that make me mentally ill? I think it just makes me human.
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