Writing

There are 3 things that I love........ architecture, writing, and color and pattern (my rugs).

I know I'm not cut out to be a practicing architect, but that doesn't take away my love for the built environment. If I could make a living as a real estate agent I would just so that I could tour all the houses... forget the clients, I just want the pass to look at every house that is for sale.

I love my rugs and I will pursue them as soon as I've got the $$$ to proceed. Whether it will be a side money making hobby, or a full on designer showroom eventually I have no idea, but I can't stop drawing patterns and coloring them in. I'm good at it.

Writing is the big other thing. I write this blog, I start a million little stories and I read 109 books last year. I can't imagine my life without books. I know my dream is to one day have one of my own books on my shelves, but to devote my self to it full time is a scary idea. I want to. I'm not doing anything else. Maybe this deep crack I'm in career wise is meant for me to be writing. It doesn't cost a thing. I know I can do it. It's easy for me. I just have to decide that I want to do it and step by step work at being a writer. I am a writer. I just have had nothing published....... yet. I try and let it go and yet I always come back to it eventually. If there is something that I feel I was meant to do this would be it. It's hard when you're whole life you see writers as mousy, starving, and depressed. I know that's how they are portrayed on TV and even in books, but if I were to take the one writer that I know personally she would be the exact opposite of all those characteristics listed above. She is endlessly fascinating, bright, vivacious, and seems to make a good living at writing. So why can't I get over this mental block on what a a writer is. There are so many mommy bloggers and mommy writers and though I could definitely be catagorized as one, I would never want to be just another one of those moms who writes and blogs. Maybe that's the difference. I may be a mom first and foremost, but that is not what I write about.

I get so concerned that being a mom is so all consuming for me. I rarley speak to adults other than my husband and a few of my kid's friend's parents. I spend so much time with my kids, but I've found that I rarely write about them. Everybody has kids and we all have the same stories about sicknesses and teachers, and funny things that they've said, that to write about them here or elsewhere seems a little redundant. I write about what I'm feeling and what I'm experiencing. So I guess I couldnt' really be catagorized as a "mommy blogger".

I dont' know what I will write, but I need to write. It's the one thing that will give me the time to spend with my kids, the opportunity to travel where and whenever I want, heck even the ability to live wherever I want. It requires no monetary investement and barely any tools. The only thing that it requires is time, of which I have an overabundance.